On Anniversaries, Happy and Otherwise

October 7 is a special and important date for me, but like so much else in our world these days it’s neither simple nor straightforward.

October 7 is the date in 2000 that I married my long time friend and partner, Emily Piccirillo.

Regrettably, just one year later, October 7, 2001 is the date that our nation started the war in Afghanistan, and began a bloody and seemingly endless war against the amorphous threat called “terrorism.” It was a hell of a first anniversary. And it was damn close to October 7 in 2002, just a couple days after our 2nd anniversary, that Congress voted to give George Bush authority to start the moral, financial and foreign policy catastrophe that is the war in Iraq. So as I say, October 7 is a date that I have very mixed feelings about.

As we face an increasingly perilous world, though, I do come back, again and again, to the significance of our relationships. As Emily wished me a happy anniversary this morning, I was filled first with embarrassment (okay, I’ll admit it – in the craziness of a political campaign I actually forgot about our anniversary for the first time), but then a very quiet joy. Emily has been with me through thick and thin for 16 years now (yes, it took us awhile to get around to getting married), and I wouldn’t trade them for anything. Through good times and bad, through delightful wine dinners and hard fought political struggle (how many have a partner who would risk arrest with you at a nonviolent anti-war action?!), they have been the best 16 years of my life.

So for all the sorrow, hardship and craziness in the world, here’s to you Emily, the love of my life – and may we have many more years together. As the blues song says, it’s great to have someone to scratch your back.